Adventures in Reverse Psychology

(begin sarcasm) The way I see it, there is so much obnoxious positivity out there in the world, and all these life coaches, counselors, and self-help gurus are all trying to make people happy, successful, and healthy. Bah! I say, let's bottle up our emotions, set the bar really low, and dodge progress like the plague. ;)

Here's what I'm wondering: "Is there some sort of users manual, or book on how to live a miserable life?" You'd be surprised to learn that there isn't a lot of info out there, only this insufferable positive thought. So when I couldn't find a how-to guide to suffering, I had to write it myself. Enjoy.